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A CAREGIVER’S STORY
Deboshmita Saha and her family faced unimaginable challenges when they moved from the US to India to support her ailing mother-in-law, only to have their lives upended by their son’s diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukaemia. Read on to learn about her son’s fight against blood cancer and her caregiving journey.
A CAREGIVER’s STORY
Deboshmita Saha and her family faced unimaginable challenges when they moved from the US to India to support her ailing mother-in-law, only to have their lives upended by their son’s diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukaemia. Read on to learn about her son’s fight against blood cancer and her caregiving journey.
A CAREGIVER’S STORY
Deboshmita Saha and her family faced unimaginable challenges when they moved from the US to India to support her ailing mother-in-law, only to have their lives upended by their son’s diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukaemia. Read on to learn about her son’s fight against blood cancer and her caregiving journey.
My husband and I met in college and in 2015, we moved to the US for work. The arrival of our eldest in 2016 filled our hearts with immeasurable joy and the birth of our youngest son towards the end of 2019 completed our family. By then, it had been over five years since we had visited India. So, prompted by our growing family and the need for assistance, we decided to make a trip back home at the suggestion of my parents.
During this time, my mother-in-law was also battling a relapse of multiple myeloma, a form of blood cancer. Hence, the prospect of receiving help with our children while also supporting my ailing mother-in-law made the decision to visit India a practical one. With a toddler and a newborn in tow, we set off for India in late November 2019, intending to stay for 6 months and establish a business to sustain my husband’s family, for whom he was the sole provider.
My husband and I met in college and in 2015, we moved to the US for work. The arrival of our eldest in 2016 filled our hearts with immeasurable joy and the birth of our youngest son towards the end of 2019 completed our family. By then, it had been over five years since we had visited India. So, prompted by our growing family and the need for assistance, we decided to make a trip back home at the suggestion of my parents.
During this time, my mother-in-law was also battling a relapse of multiple myeloma, a form of blood cancer. Hence, the prospect of receiving help with our children while also supporting my ailing mother-in-law made the decision to visit India a practical one. With a toddler and a newborn in tow, we set off for India in late November 2019, intending to stay for 6 months and establish a business to sustain my husband’s family, for whom he was the sole provider.
Deboshmita with her husband, and two sons.
Drawing on our background in hospitality and experience co-owning a restaurant in New York, we wasted no time in setting up our eatery upon our arrival in Kolkata. However, as fate would have it, the onset of the global pandemic brought unforeseen challenges. Just as we were preparing to open our restaurant to the public, COVID-19 forced us to close our doors due to a nationwide lockdown. The situation mirrored in the US, where our restaurant had to cease operations, leading to the dissolution of our partnership. The sudden loss of our primary income stream left us stranded in India, unable to return to the US due to grounded flights.
Amidst this turmoil, June ushered in a new wave of difficulties as our eldest son fell ill. Our 3-year-old would complain of severe back pain, joint aches and pain in his feet. Initially attributed to his active nature, his symptoms persisted, causing us growing concern. Following visits to medical professionals, a diagnosis of Vitamin D deficiency was made. His blood reports looked normal, save for the discovery of a very small percentage of abnormal cells. But at the time, it wasn’t anything concerning and the doctor hadn’t pointed it out either.
Deboshmita with her husband and two sons.
Drawing on our background in hospitality and experience co-owning a restaurant in New York, we wasted no time in setting up our eatery upon our arrival in Kolkata. However, as fate would have it, the onset of the global pandemic brought unforeseen challenges. Just as we were preparing to open our restaurant to the public, COVID-19 forced us to close our doors due to a nationwide lockdown. The situation mirrored in the US, where our restaurant had to cease operations, leading to the dissolution of our partnership. The sudden loss of our primary income stream left us stranded in India, unable to return to the US due to grounded flights.
Amidst this turmoil, June ushered in a new wave of difficulties as our eldest son fell ill. Our 3-year-old would complain of severe back pain, joint aches and pain in his feet. Initially attributed to his active nature, his symptoms persisted, causing us growing concern. Following visits to medical professionals, a diagnosis of Vitamin D deficiency was made. His blood reports looked normal, save for the discovery of a very small percentage of abnormal cells. But at the time, it wasn’t anything concerning and the doctor hadn’t pointed it out either.
Deboshmita’s 3-year-old amid his cancer treatment in 2020.
However, soon, a seemingly harmless swelling appeared above his left eye. Initially, we hoped it would diminish on its own, but instead, it continued to grow. With growing concern, we revisited the doctors, now more anxious than ever before. However, due to strict COVID-induced regulations in the city, things were significantly delayed. By the time we were finally allowed at the hospital, it was already August. Further blood tests revealed that his haemoglobin levels had dropped and there was a sudden spike in abnormal cells. The alarming results left us in no doubt that something was seriously wrong. The doctor we consulted happened to be my mother-in-law’s oncologist and referred us to Tata Medical Centre.
Navigating the admission process during the pandemic was challenging, compounded by the visa issues surrounding my children. As both were US citizens on a 6-month visit visa in India, the hospital hesitated to register or admit my 3-year-old due to visa expiration. But we managed to secure admission for my son after a doctor’s intervention. During his initial 12-day hospital stay, he underwent numerous tests, including an MRI that confirmed his diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukaemia, a form of blood cancer.
The diagnosis of leukaemia in such a young child was a devastating blow, compounded by our financial losses and uncertainties. The moment I heard the dreaded word “cancer” in connection with my child, my heart shattered into a million pieces. Then, witnessing my small child undergo a surgical procedure to insert a hickman line for chemotherapy access was even more devastating. The sight of his tiny body enduring what no child should face left me feeling utterly helpless, as if my heart was being squeezed in a vice.
Deboshmita’s 3-year-old amid his cancer treatment in 2020.
However, soon, a seemingly harmless swelling appeared above his left eye. Initially, we hoped it would diminish on its own, but instead, it continued to grow. With growing concern, we revisited the doctors, now more anxious than ever before. However, due to strict COVID-induced regulations in the city, things were significantly delayed. By the time we were finally allowed at the hospital, it was already August. Further blood tests revealed that his haemoglobin levels had dropped and there was a sudden spike in abnormal cells. The alarming results left us in no doubt that something was seriously wrong. The doctor we consulted happened to be my mother-in-law’s oncologist and referred us to Tata Medical Centre.
Navigating the admission process during the pandemic was challenging, compounded by the visa issues surrounding my children. As both were US citizens on a 6-month visit visa in India, the hospital hesitated to register or admit my 3-year-old due to visa expiration. But we managed to secure admission for my son after a doctor’s intervention. During his initial 12-day hospital stay, he underwent numerous tests, including an MRI that confirmed his diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukaemia, a form of blood cancer.
The diagnosis of leukaemia in such a young child was a devastating blow, compounded by our financial losses and uncertainties. The moment I heard the dreaded word “cancer” in connection with my child, my heart shattered into a million pieces. Then, witnessing my small child undergo a surgical procedure to insert a hickman line for chemotherapy access was even more devastating. The sight of his tiny body enduring what no child should face left me feeling utterly helpless, as if my heart was being squeezed in a vice.
Deboshmita’s elder son towards the end of his treatment.
As his chemotherapy cycles commenced, the mounting bills became a cause for concern. Initially, our family rallied together to cover the escalating costs, but as expenses soared to 4 lakhs, we found ourselves financially strained. Although we’d lost our home, car, and business – practically everything we had – we knew we had to forge ahead, even when it felt like we were adrift in a sea of challenges. Turning to my network of friends, particularly those in the US, I learned about Milaap through one of them. With hope and determination, I created a fundraiser in my son’s name, seeking contributions to sustain his treatment.
The outpouring of support from friends near and far, even from strangers, was overwhelming. Each contribution, each message of encouragement felt like a whispered prayer for my son’s recovery. These acts of kindness renewed my hope and gave me the strength to persevere, not just for my child but for my family as well. Amidst the financial pressures, I took on sewing cloth diapers to support my family. Balancing time between the hospital, caring for my son, and managing my younger child, I devoted hours to producing cloth diapers. Leveraging connections within various communities, I promoted my business and fundraiser, receiving assistance from compassionate women who helped spread the word.
Deboshmita’s elder son towards the end of his treatment.
As his chemotherapy cycles commenced, the mounting bills became a cause for concern. Initially, our family rallied together to cover the escalating costs, but as expenses soared to 4 lakhs, we found ourselves financially strained. Although we’d lost our home, car, and business – practically everything we had – we knew we had to forge ahead, even when it felt like we were adrift in a sea of challenges. Turning to my network of friends, particularly those in the US, I learned about Milaap through one of them. With hope and determination, I created a fundraiser in my son’s name, seeking contributions to sustain his treatment.
The outpouring of support from friends near and far, even from strangers, was overwhelming. Each contribution, each message of encouragement felt like a whispered prayer for my son’s recovery. These acts of kindness renewed my hope and gave me the strength to persevere, not just for my child but for my family as well. Amidst the financial pressures, I took on sewing cloth diapers to support my family. Balancing time between the hospital, caring for my son, and managing my younger child, I devoted hours to producing cloth diapers. Leveraging connections within various communities, I promoted my business and fundraiser, receiving assistance from compassionate women who helped spread the word.
Deboshmita’s husband and elder son.
Through the emotional toll this journey took on us, my husband was a beacon of strength. His unwavering support provided me with the strength to persevere. In times of difficulty, his moral support saw me through. Our unity has been the cornerstone of our resilience throughout this challenging journey. We had witnessed many other families crumble under similar pressures, and so we focused on maintaining a positive outlook in the face of adversity. We shielded our son from our own anxieties, recognizing the impact our emotions could have on his fragile state. Maintaining a sense of calm and composure was paramount, ensuring that we tackled each challenge as it arose.
Our son’s illness demanded our full attention and care, and we rose to the occasion. Remaining composed amidst emotional turmoil was a constant struggle, aggravated by financial worries stemming from our career transition from chefs in the US to starting anew in India. Balancing the needs of our sick child in the hospital and our infant at home presented its own set of challenges. Moving in with my in-laws for their support, especially due to their closer proximity to the hospital, was extremely helpful during this difficult period.
Our child’s battle with cancer was filled with challenges and obstacles. He faced the additional hurdle of testing positive for COVID-19 five times, leading to significant delays in his cancer treatment. Despite these setbacks, we remained steadfast and persevered. As he completed his third cycle of chemotherapy, his MRI results revealed a remarkable decrease in abnormal cells, bringing us immense relief. Every step of the way, we remained vigilant and closely monitored his progress. Finally, in April 2021, he completed his fourth and final cycle, and his cancer entered remission. The joy we felt was indescribable. Over the past two years, he has been on maintenance therapy and medications, and he is now preparing for his five-year follow-up, where we hope to confirm his safety and minimise the risk of a relapse.
Desboshmita’s husband and elder son.
Through the emotional toll this journey took on us, my husband was a beacon of strength. His unwavering support provided me with the strength to persevere. In times of difficulty, his moral support saw me through. Our unity has been the cornerstone of our resilience throughout this challenging journey. We had witnessed many other families crumble under similar pressures, and so we focused on maintaining a positive outlook in the face of adversity. We shielded our son from our own anxieties, recognizing the impact our emotions could have on his fragile state. Maintaining a sense of calm and composure was paramount, ensuring that we tackled each challenge as it arose.
Our son’s illness demanded our full attention and care, and we rose to the occasion. Remaining composed amidst emotional turmoil was a constant struggle, aggravated by financial worries stemming from our career transition from chefs in the US to starting anew in India. Balancing the needs of our sick child in the hospital and our infant at home presented its own set of challenges. Moving in with my in-laws for their support, especially due to their closer proximity to the hospital, was extremely helpful during this difficult period.
Our child’s battle with cancer was filled with challenges and obstacles. He faced the additional hurdle of testing positive for COVID-19 five times, leading to significant delays in his cancer treatment. Despite these setbacks, we remained steadfast and persevered. As he completed his third cycle of chemotherapy, his MRI results revealed a remarkable decrease in abnormal cells, bringing us immense relief. Every step of the way, we remained vigilant and closely monitored his progress. Finally, in April 2021, he completed his fourth and final cycle, and his cancer entered remission. The joy we felt was indescribable. Over the past two years, he has been on maintenance therapy and medications, and he is now preparing for his five-year follow-up, where we hope to confirm his safety and minimise the risk of a relapse.
Deboshmita’s elder son post-treatment and in recovery.
As a family, we have embraced numerous lifestyle changes aimed at reducing the chances of a recurrence. We have limited outside food consumption to once every two months, opting instead for nutrient-rich homemade meals. Our focus is on fresh, well-cooked, and thoroughly washed foods, while cutting back on packaged foods and sugar. Hygiene has become a top priority for us, contributing to a more sustainable lifestyle that our children readily embrace by observing our actions.
Now, nearly three years post-treatment, my child is in follow-up care. Our lives have returned to a sense of normalcy, and we approach each day with courage and joy. At 6 years old, he is now attending first grade. He does not yet grasp the full extent of what he went through, and we have chosen to hold off on explaining it to him for now. However, we are prepared for the day when he will inevitably have questions, and we look forward to addressing them then. For the time being, he is enjoying a typical childhood, staying active and finding joy in playing tennis. Excelling in both academics and extracurricular activities, he is immersing himself in learning and having a blast with his peers. We simply let him be a child, understanding the toll his battle with cancer has taken on him.
The post-treatment period has been dedicated to gradually reintroducing food to him. It was a slow process at first, but eventually, he began eating small amounts. The chemotherapy had left him extremely weak, depleting his appetite and energy. He struggled to move around and support his own weight due to weakened joints. Tennis played a significant role in his recovery, aiding in his training and strength-building.
Deboshmita with her family.
To those currently facing a similar situation, I echo the advice my husband often shared with me – ‘listen to the doctor, have faith in their expertise, trust their guidance, and follow their instructions.’ Without belief in the medical professionals treating your child, it is challenging to have faith in the treatment’s effectiveness. Doubts can creep in, potentially hindering progress. It is crucial to remain mentally resilient and optimistic during this trying time, even amidst financial strain and potential strain on relationships. Maintaining a positive outlook is vital, especially for your child, and have faith that things will eventually improve.
Lastly, to all parents out there, remember that you are only human. There will be moments of overwhelming exhaustion, stress, and frustration that may deeply impact you, particularly mentally. During such times, it is important to acknowledge that seeking help is not a sign of weakness. Hospitals typically offer counselling services and support groups where you can share your feelings and receive guidance. Utilise these resources to care for yourself while supporting your child through their cancer battle.
Deboshmita’s elder son post-treatment, and in recovery.
As a family, we have embraced numerous lifestyle changes aimed at reducing the chances of a recurrence. We have limited outside food consumption to once every two months, opting instead for nutrient-rich homemade meals. Our focus is on fresh, well-cooked, and thoroughly washed foods, while cutting back on packaged foods and sugar. Hygiene has become a top priority for us, contributing to a more sustainable lifestyle that our children readily embrace by observing our actions.
Now, nearly three years post-treatment, my child is in follow-up care. Our lives have returned to a sense of normalcy, and we approach each day with courage and joy. At 6 years old, he is now attending first grade. He does not yet grasp the full extent of what he went through, and we have chosen to hold off on explaining it to him for now. However, we are prepared for the day when he will inevitably have questions, and we look forward to addressing them then. For the time being, he is enjoying a typical childhood, staying active and finding joy in playing tennis. Excelling in both academics and extracurricular activities, he is immersing himself in learning and having a blast with his peers. We simply let him be a child, understanding the toll his battle with cancer has taken on him.
The post-treatment period has been dedicated to gradually reintroducing food to him. It was a slow process at first, but eventually, he began eating small amounts. The chemotherapy had left him extremely weak, depleting his appetite and energy. He struggled to move around and support his own weight due to weakened joints. Tennis played a significant role in his recovery, aiding in his training and strength-building.
Deboshmita with her family.
To those currently facing a similar situation, I echo the advice my husband often shared with me – ‘listen to the doctor, have faith in their expertise, trust their guidance, and follow their instructions.’ Without belief in the medical professionals treating your child, it is challenging to have faith in the treatment’s effectiveness. Doubts can creep in, potentially hindering progress. It is crucial to remain mentally resilient and optimistic during this trying time, even amidst financial strain and potential strain on relationships. Maintaining a positive outlook is vital, especially for your child, and have faith that things will eventually improve.
Lastly, to all parents out there, remember that you are only human. There will be moments of overwhelming exhaustion, stress, and frustration that may deeply impact you, particularly mentally. During such times, it is important to acknowledge that seeking help is not a sign of weakness. Hospitals typically offer counselling services and support groups where you can share your feelings and receive guidance. Utilise these resources to care for yourself while supporting your child through their cancer battle.
Share this story with someone who could benefit from this advice or inspiration, especially if they are going through a similar situation.
Share this story with someone who could benefit from this advice or inspiration, especially if they are going through a similar situation.
In times of need, support means everything, and with Milaap, you need not look any further. Milaap enables you to set up a fundraiser for any medical emergency within minutes, and you can easily raise funds for treatment expenses.
Do you know someone who could benefit from fundraising? Simply refer them to us and we’ll be happy to lend a hand.
Visit www.milaap.org or call us on +91 9916174848 to get started now.
For more information, write to us at cx@milaap.org.
In times of need, support means everything, and with Milaap, you need not look any further. Milaap enables you to set up a fundraiser for any medical emergency within minutes, and you can easily raise funds for treatment expenses.
Do you know someone who could benefit from fundraising? Simply refer them to us and we’ll be happy to lend a hand.
Visit www.milaap.org or call us on +91 9916174848 to get started now.
For more information, write to us at cx@milaap.org.
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